Prior to her school visits, I’m pretty sure Amy pulled Tilly aside and whispered, “Hey Tills, be a pal and act like a total shit-stick so that I will look angelic by comparison”. Because during 3 x vists to Amy’s 2016 school (if they’ll still take her), Tilly has:

• Trashed the classroom nativity scene
• Run off with the teacher’s permanent marker
• Yelled “It’s POOS!” when the teacher held up a picture of potatoes and asked the class what it was
• Performed an expressive dance in the middle of the orderly circle the children had formed during mat time
• Smashed a glass
• Up-ended jigsaw puzzles
• Inexplicably started chanting “All Blacks! All Blacks! All Blacks!” while running around the classroom as the other children studiously made Christmas cards
• Pulled apart a wooden rainbow
• Taken a bite out of a glue stick at the craft table.

Meanwhile, Amy has been folding her arms, sitting nicely, singing along to class songs, and shooting warning looks at her delinquent little sister.